Hardship – Relationship

Hardships make relationships stronger!

Growth :
“The sweetest songs of earth, have been sung in sorrow. The richest things in character, have been reached through pain.” – J.R. Miller.
I would not exchange even a single moment of hardship and trial of my past for a moment of happiness. Growing in holiness is more important than happiness. I am not neglecting the aspect that we need to be happy, just saying what’s more important.

In times of hardship, I was being sanctified & growing in Christ likeness. Yes, being a human, in those moments it did hurt, life seemed difficult, at times to a point of giving up life itself but in the hindsight those times helped me grow, and I’m sure it would feel the same for most of you. As Romans 5:3-5 puts it – tribulations produce perseverance, perseverance produces character & character produces hope & hope does not disappoint because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts.
“The real test that I believe that God is love is that tragedies don’t separate me from the conviction that God is love.” – Sinclair B. Ferguson

Relationship with God :
Few years back I would wonder how can people say they have a relationship with God. In my heart I thought that couldn’t be possible but God softened my heart(which He still renews each day) & through His Word(which is so alive and speaks right to our hearts) I realised how personal God is.

The intricacies & details in everything He has created, both visible & invisible, the depths of details of just a single cell of our body – Him knowing every hair on our head(Matthew 10:30) is evident of how much he knows us without forgetting He knows our every thought! He is so personal that while we were still sinners Christ died for us(Romans 5:8), God adopted us as His children through Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:5). He loved us so much that Jesus went through so much for us, not just physically but He bore the wrath of God on the Cross cause He loved us(and We love Him because He first loved us.
I John 4:19). When we humans create something, there is a sense of connection to that thing or when a child is born, the parents have a connection to the child, similarly God created us for His Glory(Isaiah 43:7). These are all evidence for Him being personal. Bryan Chapell puts it this way, “Relationship comes before obedience. We do not have a relationship with Him because we obey, we obey because He has made a relationship with us.”

In Christ :
Galatians 2:20 – our identity is In Christ. The phrase “in Christ” is about 75 times in the Bible. Knowing God is not enough, even the demons know God & tremble(James 2:19). Does Christ know you so that when our temporal journey on earth is complete He wouldn’t say, “Depart from me, I never knew you.”? (Matthew 7:23) Is Christ the Good Shepherd of your life? Are you following and heeding His voice? (John 10:27) Or are you a goat that He’ll easily segregate? (Matthew 25:31-46)
Jesus is the true vine. He tells us to abide in Him as He abides in us in John 15 & also calls us a friend(a relation) in the same chapter. What an amazing privilege it is, in prayer, to approach God the Father through Christ. Jesus promised to send a Helper to guide us & through the work of the Holy Spirit even in hard times & through trails He is sanctifying us & enabling us to righteous & faithful lives by convicting us of our sins.
1 John 4:13-16 summarised is that we know that we abide in Him, and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit. And that God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him.

Whenever a relationship goes through trials, putting in the hardwork brings you even closer to the other person. It was not until I hit Rock bottom in life that the Solid Rock(Christ) made me realise how weak I am by myself & I need Him more than anything. Till today, trials are what draw me more closer to God(that’s not the only way one draws closer to God) & my dependence on Him grows. Too often people say that God won’t give us more than we can handle(1 Corinthians 10:13 taken out of context), but that does happen & that’s when we run to God!
When you have a relationship with anyone, a family member or friend, you’re actions are always to please the other & not hurt them, you’re more self conscious/aware of the things you do & it’s the same with God. As God abides in us, the Holy Spirit convicts us of sin, we’re more aware towards our sin because it displeases God. When a close one tells/teaches you something you don’t obey them just for that moment, you carry it with you, similarly God’s love for you isn’t temporary, so you carry His commands in your hearts even after you are done reading His Word, after you are done dwelling upon it and even after you are done with prayer!

Emotions :
Love, Joy, Happiness, Faithfulness, forgiveness, graciousness, Trust, Awe, a sense of Belonging, Assurance, Peace, Gratitude, Desires, Sadness, Grief, Pain, Anger and many more feelings are associated with each relation we share & since we’re made the image & likeness of God we feel & go through such emotions in our relation with God also. Even the best of marriages that are out there or best of friendships will not be able to satisfy as Christ does! As Blaise Pascal puts it, “There is a God-shaped vacuum in the heart of each man which cannot be satisfied by any created thing but only by God the Creator, made known through Jesus Christ.”

Finally, when God is the Potter and we the clay(Isaiah 64:8, Romans 9:19), the Potter knows best as He is moulding us for His Glory and our sanctification. Just like Refiner’s Fire(Malachi 3:2-3), when we go through hardships, God is purifying us and removing all the impurities in us & making us more Christ like!
So, rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation & continue steadfastly in prayer – Romans 12:12.